I am not your friend.
I am many things to you, but I am not your friend.
I am your buffer, I am your place-holder,
I am your water break, I am your pre-game,
I am your I-forgot-to-tell-you-about-it-but-I-wish-you-were-there-friend,
I am your smile-when-you-see-her-although-you-don’-really-mean-to-friend.
I am your ignore-her-texts-friend.
I am your make-the-people-dance-friend, cause to you only I can ridicule myself in front of strangers.
I am your talk-behind-her-back-friend.
I am your let’s-use-her-as-collateral-damage-during-our-relationship-mess-of-a-fight-friend.
I am your get-me-food-friend.
I am your I-will-be-angry-at-you-right-now-for-no-reason-to-release-my-anger-friend.
I am your token-black-friend.
I am your it’s-okay-to-not-respect-her-friend.
I am your she’s-cool-but-I-can-never-like-her-like-that-cause-she’s-not-attractive-enough-friend.
I am your let’s-stop-talking-cause-she’s-here-friend.
I am your “over-sensitive”-can’t-take-a-joke-friend.
I am your “I-told-you-about-it”-but-you-really-didn’t-friend.
I am your unnecessary-friend.
I am your make-me-laugh-when-I-feel-stressed-friend.
I am your pity-friend.
I am your disregard-what-I-have-to-say-because-I’m-too-in-my-feels-friend.
I am your come-support-my-cause-but-I-will-never-do-the-same-for-you-friend.
I am your you-know-everybody-please-connect-me-friend.
I am your replaceable-friend.
I am your easy-to-forget-friend.
I am your I-don’t-need-to-check-up-on-you-because-my-life-is-going-great-friend.
I am your I’m-too-busy-let’s-talk-later-but-really-never-friend.
I am your I-will-hang-with-you-for-now-cause-my-actual-friends-are-not-here-friend.
I am your my-problems-are-bigger-than-yours-friend.
I am your you-don’t-have-to-care-about-me-friend.
I am your stand-by-and-watch-your-friends-say-shit-about-my-race-friend.
I am your invisible friend.
I am your friend that you don’t really know.
I am your sad friend.
Actually, I am not your friend.
And so whenever you start to pretend that you are,
Whenever I start to remember these feelings,
I tell myself.
These people are not my friends.
Tracy Eric Writes… about “friends”